Sunday, November 22, 2009

I want to run away....

Today i went to see my brother who studies at narendrapur.Its the best school in WEst bengal but its residential.Going there make me nostalgic.The memory of those days when i first went there as a 10 year kid flashes in my mind.Life then was so wonderful just laugh and play.With my "rosy cheeks,dimple chin" and sweet smile there were not many whose hearts i couldnt win.Life was so different and nice.
  • The only movie star I care about was then not Srk or any other khan but Tom and jerry ,mickeymouse ,goofy,superman..
  • The football team i used to shout for was not Arsenal or ManU but my section football team...
  • It was not a big deal to have more than one best friend and that best friend also use to change often.
  • Parents use to seem as angels when toys and candies use to pop out from their pockets
  • The bravest thing which one imagine to think about is to walk into a dark room alone and ghosts seemed to be the only enemy of human
  • the most shameful thing to me then was to loose to my friends in badminton match.
  • friend were just not the guys to "hang "out with but those who always used to put out their helping hand whenever i was in a tight corner.
  • exams were nothing more other than hurdles to go to new class
But now life has become so complex.I would be lying if i say growing up have no advantages.I can now watch whatever movie i like.Parents dont censure about what programmes to watch on T.v.
Mother doesnt enquire about whom i am talking on phone.In a word i have got more freedom.But with that have come more responsibilities and worries.One always have to pretend to be "cool" one need to be careful so that huge ego of others are not hurt.Life actually seems to have lost that "free-spirit of childhood"
AND now as i am in the final year of my engineering college the most important thing that is bugging me is thoughts about my career.Failure now just doesnt mean that one is not able to go to next class but failure here means that ones whole life becomes failure.i have got a taste of how bad is that feeling of that failure last wednesday when during the campuss placement of Vedanta.It was the first time i felt the need of a shoulder to cry upon,its the first time such a hollow feeling gripped me its the first time i felt so alone.And now i have more difficult hurdles before me.The entrance xams for MBA and then probably the campussplacement of tcs.I have dreamt about these for a long time but i have seen god almost always crush my dreams.I am feeling very jittery and i dont want to taste failure again....I just want to RUN AWAYand again return to those innocent days of childhood....
"Wish i could be always that way
As a little baby and keep my worries away"


  1. hehehe that's why I don't want to grow up..
    I don't want to bear responsiblities and worries.. I just want to be a sixteen year old girl... :)

  2. I used to love watching watching Tom and Jerry. Still do :)
    As one grows, responsiblities to pop in. Can't help it :D
    Thanks for your comment. Glad you liked my post. How old are you by the way?

  3. I too, like you am scared of failure. I detest life because of that.

  4. @nahl:Ya failure is a BAD THING..and successive failure is too disgusting..
    @cursed:i am not too 22

  5. Ah!i too don't wanna grow up at ol :(

    i dun seem to be grown up as such,coz m short heighten lol xD