Sunday, August 30, 2009

diary....

Well i have not posted for a long time.Actually i was busy....Anyway my blog is mostly about my personal feelings,ideas etc.This post will be as usual.i am jst jotting down some important events.

RESULTS-:Well this was really important.I am always afraid about this6 letter word--"R-E-S-U-L-T".this time it was no different.however again the bullet missed me.I got 7.93.Well its not impressive,rather its poor.But scoring this by putting almost no effort,really its good.i have feared much worser because never before i had such a poor preparation.But again god saved me.it was satisfactory xcept the grade in seminar.i xpected an "O".Anyway this time also all my mess mates scored heavily xcept pu.

MIDWEEK PARTY-:Well this time prince gave a party.Really how much i have changed.1 yr ago this time around i didnt use to touch booze.But now i find it difficult to refuse a drink.Anyway after a few pegs i began to feel tipsy and i dont remember much.Later from the videos captured by one of my frnds i found out that we had a great time.thank u prince for ur generosity.

PUJA SHOPPING-:Well my preparations of pujo has stated.I have started shopping for the pujo.i spent saturday and sunday afternoon for that purpose.I had bought fine salwars for my sisters,a sari for my mom...I also bought an "anarkali" kurta for one of mys best frnd.besides i also brought a shirt for me frm peter england.

OCCASSIONAL NIGHTMARES-:well i am trying my best to forget "da" and move forward in life.I have managed it to some extent.but often some old memory flashes in my mind and i become sad.
"baby i am nothing without you
i know i shouldnt miss u
but i cant let u go"
Well i am not so desperate but the wound takes time to heal....

Anyway cant remember anything more.looking forward to the pujas and feeling jittery abt CAT....

Saturday, August 15, 2009

mindless musings..

Well i am going thorough a lean patch.A sword is always hanging over my neck that is my 6th sem result.I am worried about it.Beside this the cat xam is also drawing near...And above this another feeling is always bugging me.Well losing the grl u fantasise is one of the most bad thing to happen to a guy..bt a more worse feeling u will have when u see that grl hanging out wid some other guy...Really that feeling cant be described in words..Its one of the worst thing to happen.I am trying my best to be happy..I am always trying to laugh when wid my frnds...and when i am alone i am trying to keep me busy wid studies...bt a sunken feeling is gripping me.last few weeks i am trying to get rid of this bad feeling bt i cant...I have thought that i have moved on in life bt how wrong i am!!!!!people feel the importance of anything when they lose it..and the same thing happened wid me..
Anyway time is a great healer...So i am hoping for the best and praying to God to make me happy..

Saturday, August 8, 2009

I WILL ALWAYS WALK ALONE.....

Well all my frnds r now ngaged.And whenever i meet anyone they ask abt my status.And they r baffled when they learn that i am single..They think i am some sort of abnormal...I sympathise wid them bcas these guys have never been where i have been.I am always sober..I need not to get drunk in love and then suddenly realise its all over.I have gone through it and dont want to endure it again.I am a wonderful specimen for "romantically-dead-guy" research.Truely speaking the idea of dating anyone doesnt xcite me anymore.I still often have some silly crush but the bubble bursts soon.I feel romance is something not meant for me.I have enough problems to handle,enough tensions about my life......Ijst dont want to find another maniac to think abt..Imagine what will happen to me then; i will have double trouble!!!!
I jst want to be alone.there so much pressure, so much xpectations,so much tension....
I want to get out of this situation and want to go where there are no routine,no dissapointment,no pretense,no rules......
I WILL ALWAYS WALK ALONE WITH MY SHADOW FOR COMPANY.....